Divorce from a kid’s perspective: I’m in charge!
February 20, 2011 2 Comments
This period focuses on high school. During high school, the “glory days,” a person is alive. He is who he is.
There were days when I felt free, but I deeply realized the cost of this freedom, in spite of my apparent happiness to be free. I somehow knew that I would never be free. There was a longing to prove myself in spite of my circumstances. Other children in this position seem to take a defeated position and refuse to thrive. The divorce is crippling to a child’s self-identity, in most cases.
“My folks are tired of fighting. The court ruled that I don’t have to see Dad unless I want to. The good part is that I can see him whenever I want…all I’ve got to do is to tell Mom I want to see him, and she has to take me. When I turn sixteen, I can drive myself to see him! No more chains of bondage mandating my weekend activities or Christmas details. I’m free!
I’m so sick of those Christmases. “If you get the presents here, you leave them here.” What a bunch of boloney! “It’s my year to have them at Christmas…you had them for Thanksgiving”…they’re not going to own me anymore! I’m free!
Free? Did I just say that? Free from what? I’ve still got four parents, a step-sister, two half-sisters, and eight grandparents! That’s not free, that’s nuts! Hey I don’t care, it’s as close to normal as I’ve ever been…at least the weekends are.
My brother is growing up. He’s not doing too well with this whole scene. It seems that he’s been hurting a whole lot more than I have been. I should have taken better care of him. It’s my fault. Oh well, he’ll be o.k.
Band is life. My friends are all in it. We go to games, travel around to competitions, and even take end-of-the-year trips! I don’t have to fool with any parents or circumstances when I’m with my friends.
Yeah, I’ve got a girlfriend. We’re gonna get married after I graduate college. What do you mean most high school romances don’t make it to marriage?…you’re crazy! I’m gonna escape, go to college, get married and show them all how to do it right!
I could just run away now! Don’t think I haven’t considered it. No more problems…I could just leave it all.”